SURVEY DATA · MOTHER’S DAY 2026

Millennial moms are carrying the heaviest invisible load. A spa day won’t fix that.

By Priya Rajendran, CEO & Co-founder, It’s a Family Thing! · April 2026

We surveyed* 2,000 American moms to find out what they actually need- and what they don’t want on Mother’s Day. The data revealed something some big problems.

There’s one stat from our new survey that stopped me in my tracks: 40% of moms say no one gets the credit when their household runs smoothly. That means not even them.

It was the single most powerful stat, beating “I do” by three percentage points. Only 7% said their partner gets the credit.

Moms are burning out, but that’s primarily because they have to do one thing: constant reminders, follow ups, texting, adding to calendars.

“The average mom spends the equivalent of more than 15 full workdays a year just following up on things she already asked for.”

Here’s the problem with this: On top of the work, they’re managing people who should already know what they need to do. In fact, more than 1 in 4 moms (27%) spends at least 3 hours every week on follow-up alone. One in ten spends 5 hours or more. And yet “not having to remind others” ranked #3 on our Hierarchy of Mom Needs – above better communication, above less responsibility, above almost everything except rest and more help.

The 2026 Hierarchy of Mom Needs

What moms with kids under 19 say would most reduce their day-to-day mental load

#1. More personal time to rest and recharge — 42%

#2. More help from other family members — 40%

#3. Not having to remind others about tasks or responsibilities — 37%

#4. Better communication within the household — 33%

#5. Better follow-through from my child or children — 32%

#6. Less overall responsibility — 24%

What’s not on this list? Definitely not a robe. The top three answers are all about redistribution of time, of tasks, of the mental load itself

And what this means for you is that your mom doesn’t need more self-care. She actually needs you and the rest of the family to show up.

For moms with kids over 19, the order shifts slightly but the message is the same: more help from family (31%) becomes the #1 need, with personal time (29%) and not having to remind others (25%) close behind. The exhaustion doesn’t stop when the kids grow up, it essentially changes shape.

How do moms actually feel?

We asked moms how being responsible for repeatedly reminding, organizing, and following up on household tasks makes them feel. Among moms with kids under 19:

Mentally drained — 43%
Overwhelmed — 40%
Frustrated — 30%
Can’t fully relax or switch off — 34%
Like the only one keeping things running — 33%
Mental load falls mostly on me — 30%
Underappreciated — 26%
Time and energy aren’t respected — 25%
Invisible or unseen for the work I do — 24%
Resentful, even if I don’t say it out loud — 17%

Nearly a third of moms with kids at home feel like the only one keeping everything running — and just as many say they can never fully switch off, even when they’re not actively doing anything. Been there!

The generational divide

BUT, not all moms are feeling this the same way. The generational differences in our data are striking.

Millennial moms

Mentally drained — 46% (highest of any generation)
Resentful — 20% (highest of any generation)
Want a spa day — 48%
Want someone to handle life admin — 21%

Gen X moms

#1 need: More help from family — 41%
Mentally drained — 31%
Want a spa day — 36%
Resentful — 12%

Boomer moms

#1 wish: Someone to professionally clean the house — 40%
Want to skip cooking — 27%
Want a spa day — 24% (lowest of any generation)
Overwhelmed — 15% (lowest of any generation)

Millennial moms carry the heaviest invisible load of any generation – and also the highest desire for a spa day.

Gen X has largely stopped asking for pampering. Their #1 need is simply more help from family – practical support over pampering.

Boomer moms show a completely different profile: a clean house beats a spa day by nearly two to one.

Only 7% of all moms say their partner gets the credit when things run smoothly, and just 15% say they share credit equally. The data suggests that much of the household’s invisible coordination still routes through mom — and often goes unrecognized.

Three numbers every partner should see

40% of moms say no one gets credit when the household runs smoothly — not even them
More than 15 full workdays lost per year to following up on things already asked
Only 7% of moms say their partner gets the credit when things run smoothly

This is exactly why we built It’s a Family Thing. Not another app that gives mom a smarter to-do list, but one that helps the whole family share the work of running a home. Because the problem was never that moms needed better tools to remind their families. The problem is that too often, moms are still the only ones carrying the reminder load at all.

For more information about this survey or the data behind it, please contact reeves@smoresup.com.

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*Methodology: Talker Research surveyed 2,000 American moms who have access to the internet; the survey was commissioned by It’s a Family Thing and administered and conducted online by Talker Research between April 6 and April 10, 2026. Data was collected and compared between parents with kids over 19 and under 19. Results are based on self-reported data.